wallace-thrasher

Longmont Potion Castle 13 (2017)

Track 10: Mongoose

SPEAKER_18: Hello?
SPEAKER_13: Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_10: Goose? What kind of a book is it?
SPEAKER_13: I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't speak English. Only a little bit...
SPEAKER_18: Mungoose, the magazine?
SPEAKER_13: Where? I don't know. What are you talking about? I've got games. I've got comics.
SPEAKER_13: I don't even know what it is. Is it a game?
SPEAKER_00: Is it called moose? There's one called how Randy the moose turned his frown upside down.
SPEAKER_13: I looked, I looked. I checked mongoose.
SPEAKER_13: A mongoose. A mongoose? Is that an animal?
SPEAKER_11: I'm sorry. I think we're having a problem with.
SPEAKER_11: with our phone.
SPEAKER_11: Do you want to use our bathroom?
SPEAKER_11: Stop calling back.
SPEAKER_11: Hello?
SPEAKER_02: Hello.
SPEAKER_11: Hi.
SPEAKER_02: Were you looking for books?
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I don't know what's happened.
SPEAKER_09: Sorry.
SPEAKER_09: I'm not sure either. I just put someone on hold.
SPEAKER_09: Were you calling looking for books with a papoos?
SPEAKER_02: No, I was looking for books about a mongus.
SPEAKER_02: Mongos?
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
SPEAKER_11: I'm sorry? We have story time this morning and I can barely hear you.
SPEAKER_02: Oh, that's, that's...
SPEAKER_02: Never mind.
SPEAKER_02: We don't have anything on Monguses.
SPEAKER_08: I don't have anything about papooses.
SPEAKER_08: This extension...
SPEAKER_08: What's going on? I don't have an extension.
SPEAKER_08: I don't understand.
SPEAKER_08: There's something weird going on on my phone.
SPEAKER_03: Hello?
SPEAKER_08: Hi, can you...
SPEAKER_11: Tell me how to spell papoose?
SPEAKER_11: P-A-P-O-O-F-E.
SPEAKER_11: Okay, that's what I thought.
SPEAKER_11: And you're sure they were at the cathedral...
SPEAKER_03: I'm sorry?
SPEAKER_11: You said your friend bought it here?
SPEAKER_03: What kind of...
SPEAKER_03: What kind of item are we talking about?
SPEAKER_11: You asked me if we carry a book called Papoose, right?
SPEAKER_03: No, he asked me if we carry a book called Mongoose.
SPEAKER_11: Oh, you're not yourself?
SPEAKER_03: No.
SPEAKER_03: I picked up the phone as a mail caller.
SPEAKER_03: He asked we carried a magazine called Mungoos.
SPEAKER_11: Is this a...
SPEAKER_03: Hello?
SPEAKER_03: Hello?
SPEAKER_03: Hello?
SPEAKER_03: Am I talking this on in the Georgia Tech store?
SPEAKER_11: No, this is the Cathedral bookstore.
SPEAKER_11: Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_11: Okay, well...
SPEAKER_11: Oh, weird.
SPEAKER_11: And...
SPEAKER_11: Okay.
SPEAKER_11: All right.
SPEAKER_11: Thanks.
SPEAKER_17: Thank.
SPEAKER_11: Thank you.
SPEAKER_11: Yeah.
SPEAKER_17: Like I tried to tell you before, I think there's some sort of a breakdown in communication.
SPEAKER_17: I don't know how much clearer I can be.
SPEAKER_17: That book called Papoose, I would know about.
SPEAKER_13: Okay, well, if you're going to be rude, I can't help you.
SPEAKER_17: I own the goddamn store.
SPEAKER_17: So what do you want me to do?
SPEAKER_17: I mean, this is insane.
SPEAKER_10: I'm sorry if I'm lying to you, and if I'm a dumb person, I can accept that.
SPEAKER_10: God bless you, sir.
SPEAKER_03: I don't know what is happening with your phone, but it's got a moose in a mailing carton and a girl with glasses.
SPEAKER_11: The major moose?
SPEAKER_11: He said super goose.
SPEAKER_11: Super goose.
SPEAKER_10: I don't know what you guys are talking about.
SPEAKER_10: Not mother goose.
SPEAKER_10: I don't even...
SPEAKER_10: It doesn't seem familiar to me.
SPEAKER_16: So, it looks like I have 150 of the good luck mini moose.
SPEAKER_16: I have one moose on the loose on the...
SPEAKER_16: this book, and then three stuffed animals for a different style of moose.
SPEAKER_07: I'm sorry for the book, I am the goose.
SPEAKER_16: Moose on the loose is the only book we have.
SPEAKER_07: And that's the one that you're looking for?
SPEAKER_16: Okay.
SPEAKER_16: You guys need a bunch of moose stuff.
SPEAKER_07: Oh, I'm not entirely sure what's going on.
SPEAKER_16: This is a toy store. You guys called us looking for moose stuff.
SPEAKER_07: Okay, sir, I'm really confused right now.
SPEAKER_07: Who are you?
SPEAKER_07: work with book people, so I don't know exactly what's going cold.
SPEAKER_18: Okay, well, anyway.
SPEAKER_07: Yes.
SPEAKER_18: I'm not sure why you guys are calling me.
SPEAKER_04: What's the book that it was?
SPEAKER_04: He said mongoose.
SPEAKER_04: To me, he said caboose, so I thought it might be the little red caboose.
SPEAKER_04: So I'm not sure?
SPEAKER_04: Okay.
SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I think calling your friend is probably going to be the best.
SPEAKER_04: He's not a friend of mine.
SPEAKER_04: Okay?
SPEAKER_04: Okay.
SPEAKER_09: All right.
SPEAKER_09: Hello?
SPEAKER_18: Hello.
SPEAKER_09: This is a Kino-Klinger book store, and the summer
SPEAKER_09: somebody transferred to you.
SPEAKER_18: Yeah, so you were now the third bookstore that's called me and asked me about a book.
SPEAKER_09: Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_18: So I don't know which books they're looking for.
SPEAKER_18: So did I want a prize or, I mean, what's going on here?
SPEAKER_09: No, he said the goose.
SPEAKER_18: Okay, so first person said mongoose, second person said caboose, and this person said goose.
SPEAKER_18: So I don't know what's going on, but I'm actually getting really tired of all the phone calls.
SPEAKER_09: Yeah, I know.
SPEAKER_09: Yeah, okay.
SPEAKER_09: He is your friend.
SPEAKER_18: Not my friend.
SPEAKER_09: Oh, I'm sorry.
SPEAKER_09: He's calling a business.
SPEAKER_18: and then another business called me, and then another business called me, and then another business called me,
SPEAKER_18: and then now you called me.
SPEAKER_09: Okay. Okay, it's true. Okay.
SPEAKER_18: Oh, yes, this is City Lights.
SPEAKER_18: I think your friend transferred me over to you.
SPEAKER_18: Not my friend.
SPEAKER_21: He's looking for the Papoose book?
SPEAKER_18: So you're the fifth or sixth call.
SPEAKER_18: I feel like I'm in some sort of twilight zone.
SPEAKER_18: So what do you think he's looking for?
SPEAKER_21: Oh, there's a book that he said his friend got here called Papoose.
SPEAKER_18: No idea what we need.
SPEAKER_18: So first it was Mongoose, then it was Caboos, then it was Goose, now it was Papoose.
SPEAKER_18: So he's a super freak, and I've had calls from book people.
SPEAKER_18: people. Some woman didn't speak English. And now you. And whoa. Oh, hey, okay. Whoa.
SPEAKER_21: So they sounded so kind of official. It's like he was really. Yeah, it's got to get worse. I don't know.
SPEAKER_21: Oh, man. How's surreal. All right. Hello. Hello? Hello?
SPEAKER_05: Hi. Hi. Can you hear me? Yes.
SPEAKER_05: Okay. So I'm searching for a mad goose. Is that one of it? It was mongoose. Okay, let's see.
SPEAKER_05: Mungoose? I don't see anything in our system for mongoose either.
SPEAKER_06: Um, who am I speaking to?
SPEAKER_05: This is women and children first. Oh, I'm not really sure.
SPEAKER_05: Yeah. Mongooses.
SPEAKER_06: You're both looking?
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, this is weird. A gentleman called and said, I'm looking for mad goose.
SPEAKER_05: But now we have mongoose. Okay. Well, I don't have any mongoose list. Okay. Hello? Hello? Hi. Hi. Are you the person who's looking for the mongoose? I think you guys called for it. Did one of you called for it?
SPEAKER_12: You were looking for a call. I am the masseuse, right? This is bizarre. Worker. Hello? Hello? Is this a serious phone call because I don't know what's going.
SPEAKER_14: on. Hello?
SPEAKER_14: Hey. Who? Something may have just happened. Did someone call you? Yeah. Was he a strange fellow? He was just asking me the most strange
SPEAKER_14: questions I've ever had on a phone call. Hello? Hello? Are you hearing that? Yeah, that was strange.
SPEAKER_14: This is very weird. This seems to have gotten strange. Are you, are you hearing that?
SPEAKER_14: Yeah, so I'm listening and I'm struggling because they have customers in the store. My mind wandered. Oh. Oh.
SPEAKER_14: Do you want to start all over?
SPEAKER_12: Someone called asking if we had the mad goose.
SPEAKER_12: What kind of goose?
SPEAKER_12: Mad goose? Mad goose.
SPEAKER_12: That is really totally weird. The person just called me and asked...
SPEAKER_12: To ask for a mongoose? He didn't seem to know...
SPEAKER_09: I was told the mad goose. It's called mad goose?
SPEAKER_09: No. No. No. No. Okay. It's about a masseuse.
SPEAKER_12: The masseuse?
SPEAKER_12: Hi. Were you asking about a book called I'm the masseuse?
SPEAKER_12: No.
SPEAKER_13: No? I never had a weird phone call like this, ever. It's weird. It's vibrating, and it's... I don't even know, and I never even heard of the mongoose.
SPEAKER_15: I'm sorry, no, I don't carry a book called Van Moose.
SPEAKER_15: No.
SPEAKER_15: Is there a piano playing? I can't really hear you.
SPEAKER_09: I hear that, too.
SPEAKER_15: All right. Can you call me back in a minute?
SPEAKER_10: Oh, okay. I can't really hear you over the music so much.
SPEAKER_10: I know. I don't know whose music it is.
SPEAKER_10: Hi. Sorry. You have two of us. You have two bookstores.
SPEAKER_14: I can't wait, man. We get a lot of background noise here.
SPEAKER_10: You have two of us on the line at the same time.
SPEAKER_14: I can't hear you. I'm just... Hello?
SPEAKER_10: You have two of us on the line at the same time?
SPEAKER_09: Are we on two lines here?
SPEAKER_10: I think we're on two lines here.
SPEAKER_09: Okay. I was answering a question here from the bookstore.
SPEAKER_09: Oh, I'm sorry? Someone just called... I'm sorry? Can I help you?
SPEAKER_06: Oh, gosh. No, just... I actually just received a call from a gentleman who was looking for a book titled
SPEAKER_06: What's that?
SPEAKER_11: You're an interesting person.
SPEAKER_09: The title is Mongoose?
SPEAKER_09: Is it? I'm trying to look up something for someone, and they gave me Vamoose.
SPEAKER_09: How can I help?
SPEAKER_09: I'm confused.
SPEAKER_09: I was getting back to someone who was on line one. Yeah.
SPEAKER_09: Oh, we're on a conference call. I don't know.
SPEAKER_09: Happy book selling.
SPEAKER_20: I think you are mistaken.
SPEAKER_17: I'm so sorry.
SPEAKER_20: You are mistaken.
SPEAKER_09: I'm so sorry.
SPEAKER_20: I don't need your attitude.
SPEAKER_06: I'm sorry, are you talking to me?
SPEAKER_20: What's wrong with you?
SPEAKER_06: I'm rather confused myself.
SPEAKER_20: You are not welcome here.
SPEAKER_06: At first, it was a guy on the phone.
SPEAKER_20: Do not call here again.
SPEAKER_20: I'm here. I'm back.
SPEAKER_20: Did you call my father yesterday and talk to a 79-year-old man this way?
SPEAKER_20: Is that what you did?
SPEAKER_20: You fucking weakling?
SPEAKER_05: Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_20: You speak to my father that way again. We're going to have a real problem.
SPEAKER_20: I don't know what the heck just happened.
SPEAKER_20: You're a fucking weakling.
SPEAKER_13: Man goose.
SPEAKER_20: You're a man.
SPEAKER_20: Mentally ill.
SPEAKER_01: I was told to ask you about the Van Moose book you bought so your friend could buy it.
SPEAKER_20: I've talked to your friend. He was insulting.
SPEAKER_20: And I thought it was odd.
SPEAKER_01: No, he said that you were his friend.
SPEAKER_19: No, no, no. So just talk me through it.
SPEAKER_19: So why is your friend calling us?
SPEAKER_19: Who is your friend?
SPEAKER_19: And why is he doing this?
SPEAKER_01: Sir, this is a business.
SPEAKER_01: I don't know what the hell's going.
SPEAKER_19: No, no.
SPEAKER_19: We're a business, too, so I'm trying to figure out who's doing this.
SPEAKER_19: I have no idea.
SPEAKER_19: Okay.
SPEAKER_19: He threatened to come in and piss on our floor.
SPEAKER_19: floor. This is really gross. I would love to get my hands on the person who did this.
SPEAKER_10: Please take us off your call list.