Longmont Potion Castle 7 (2009)

Longmont Potion Castle 7

Track 8: LPC 7 Medley 2

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  • Alex Trebek: Yeah, I'm just your neighbor looking to borrow Broom here today.
  • Alex Trebek: Yeah, well, why don't you go fuck yourself, too?
  • Alex Trebek: I don't think that'll do here today, and I...
  • Alex Trebek: Why don't you can stick it up your ass? You got some K-Y Jelly?
  • SPEAKER_05: Remind you when you were in the pen?
  • Alex Trebek: Listen to us, pal.
  • Alex Trebek: Hello?
  • Alex Trebek: Hello?
  • SPEAKER_05: Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello?
  • LPC: Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hi, I was hoping to borrow your broom, if I could just for a few minutes? Just be helping us out. We're stage hands here.
  • Eddie Money: Hey, you know what, could you please quit fucking around with me? You realize this is a charity line, a pediatric's age charity line for children. Why are you such a fucking asshole?
  • SPEAKER_07: You need a broom?
  • EDDIE MONEY: You know what?
  • LPC: I need a broom.
  • EDDIE MONEY: Why don't you suck my fucking dick, man?
  • EDDIE MONEY: I'll tear you fucking heart out if I get my hand, I'll have to get my hands on you.
  • EDDIE MONEY: You scumbag, motherfucker.
  • EDDIE MONEY: Quit calling this number.
  • Alex Trebek: You got that? You gave me the number. You gave me the number.
  • EDDIE MONEY: Oh, shit. I never gave you this number and stop calling you.
  • EDDIE MONEY: All right? Because I'll just call ATT and get you and get sure enough.
  • EDDIE MONEY: I need a broom.
  • EDDIE MONEY: You need a broom to fucking put the shit back in your mouth.
  • SPEAKER_07: I need a broom!
  • Alex Trebek: Hello?
  • Alex Trebek: How you doing?
  • SPEAKER_05: What company is this?
  • Alex Trebek: Tom Life.
  • Alex Trebek: And, uh, calling about your expiration?
  • SPEAKER_05: Why are you calling on Time Life magazine?
  • Alex Trebek: Tom Life.
  • SPEAKER_05: Okay, but don't call my cell phone anymore.
  • Alex Trebek: I got the squawk box.
  • Alex Trebek: I got a squawk box, three?
  • SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
  • SPEAKER_05: I don't know, I don't know who it is.
  • SPEAKER_05: Squark box!
  • SPEAKER_05: Squawk box!
  • Alex Trebek: Squawk box!
  • SPEAKER_05: What's a scot box?
  • SPEAKER_05: I don't, don't call me.
  • SPEAKER_05: my cell phone anymore, buy.
  • Alex Trebek: Squawk box, right?
  • SPEAKER_05: What's a scot box?
  • SPEAKER_05: Is this a video game or something?
  • Alex Trebek: Well, let me tell you.
  • SPEAKER_05: Okay, what is it?
  • Alex Trebek: I need $249.
  • SPEAKER_05: I'm not giving you a $200. This is fraud.
  • SPEAKER_05: Get off my phone.
  • Alex Trebek: $200.
  • SPEAKER_05: Hello?
  • Alex Trebek: Hello?
  • SPEAKER_05: Stop calling me. I'm talking to a pubbuses.
  • SPEAKER_05: I don't, stop calling me.
  • Alex Trebek: I need to borrow a broom.
  • SPEAKER_05: You don't need to, just get off my phone.
  • Alex Trebek: I need to borrow a broom.
  • SPEAKER_05: A broom?
  • SPEAKER_05: I need a broom.
  • Alex Trebek: I need to borrow a broom.
  • SPEAKER_05: Stop calling me.
  • SPEAKER_05: I'm going to change my phone number.
  • SPEAKER_05: Stop doing this.
  • Alex Trebek: I need to borrow a broom.
  • Alex Trebek: Don't do that. Don't do that. Don't do that.
  • SPEAKER_05: You're not in my call, Idaho.
  • SPEAKER_05: I'm going to talk to you.
  • SPEAKER_05: Stop calling my number.
  • SPEAKER_05: I'm talking, I'm an actor,
  • SPEAKER_05: so stop calling me.
  • SPEAKER_05: I'm talking to people in L.A.
  • SPEAKER_05: You're running my,
  • SPEAKER_05: I just love a message for somebody,
  • SPEAKER_05: and you cut it on the line.
  • SPEAKER_05: Now, I don't know if they got it,
  • SPEAKER_05: and I have to call them again.
  • SPEAKER_05: Now, uh, stop calling me.
  • SPEAKER_07: Let me talk to you.
  • SPEAKER_07: Let me talk to you.
  • SPEAKER_07: Let me talk to you.
  • SPEAKER_05: You're an idiot,
  • SPEAKER_05: you're a, you're a sum cook,
  • SPEAKER_05: go ahead.
  • SPEAKER_05: Get a real job.
  • SPEAKER_05: Help me out.
  • SPEAKER_05: I'm not going to help you out.
  • SPEAKER_05: I'm not going to help you out.
  • SPEAKER_05: I'm not going to help you out.
  • SPEAKER_05: This is fraud.
  • SPEAKER_05: I'm going to call the police if you don't stop this.
  • Alex Trebek: You're boom.
  • Alex Trebek: Yeah, pick up.
  • SPEAKER_05: Okay.
  • Alex Trebek: What would you like?
  • Alex Trebek: I want Manori.
  • Alex Trebek: I want Sufatui.
  • Alex Trebek: You help me?
  • Alex Trebek: Your fucker.
  • Alex Trebek: Help me with my order.
  • Alex Trebek: Okay, where would you like me for?
  • Alex Trebek: I would like Manuri.
  • Alex Trebek: Manduri, okay, my friend, that's a good choice.
  • Alex Trebek: And, um, two rice.
  • Alex Trebek: Two rice is okay, very good.
  • Alex Trebek: And I'm a two.
  • Alex Trebek: Okay, come again, please.
  • Alex Trebek: Uh, you give it to me now, yes?
  • Alex Trebek: Yeah, I give it to you now, you fucking Habib.
  • Alex Trebek: Hello, hello?
  • Alex Trebek: Hello?
  • Alex Trebek: Hello, can you help me with an order?
  • SPEAKER_03: You keep calling you again?
  • Alex Trebek: No.
  • SPEAKER_03: You keep calling you again?
  • Alex Trebek: No, sir.
  • SPEAKER_03: Why calling so many times, sir?
  • Alex Trebek: For food?
  • SPEAKER_03: No, he didn't order for food.
  • SPEAKER_03: I want food.
  • Alex Trebek: Uh, tonight.
  • SPEAKER_03: You bothering too, too, too, too, too, too, too much.
  • SPEAKER_03: Help me out with your food, please.
  • SPEAKER_03: You're bothering me too, too, too, too, too, too, too much.
  • SPEAKER_03: You can help me.
  • SPEAKER_03: I have a call, call our ID.
  • SPEAKER_03: Okay.
  • Alex Trebek: Help me.
  • SPEAKER_03: Bye.
  • SPEAKER_03: Bye.
  • SPEAKER_09: Ah.
  • SPEAKER_09: I'm even music.
  • SPEAKER_09: Music.
  • Alex Trebek: Hi.
  • SPEAKER_09: Hi.
  • Alex Trebek: I'm after Duckling Fantasy.
  • SPEAKER_09: What genre is that?
  • Alex Trebek: It's like squawk.
  • SPEAKER_09: Whoa, you just have some crazy feedback echo.
  • Alex Trebek: No.
  • Alex Trebek: It's more of a squelch that they've got a sound that I...
  • Alex Trebek: I could describe it as squelch.
  • SPEAKER_09: Say the artist one more time.
  • SPEAKER_07: MC squack box.
  • SPEAKER_09: Whoa.
  • Alex Trebek: Crazy squawk box.
  • SPEAKER_09: Your, your phone is going crazy.
  • Alex Trebek: MC squack box.
  • SPEAKER_09: MC squawk box?
  • Alex Trebek: Hello, Miwa.
  • Alex Trebek: Do you carry squawk there?
  • SPEAKER_09: Squawk?
  • Alex Trebek: Yeah.
  • SPEAKER_09: Let's find out.
  • SPEAKER_09: We do not have squawk.
  • Alex Trebek: Um, okay, how about squat?
  • SPEAKER_09: Squat.
  • SPEAKER_09: Like I'm squat.
  • SPEAKER_09: the floor?
  • Alex Trebek: How about squat?
  • Alex Trebek: S-Q-U-A-P?
  • SPEAKER_09: Squat.
  • SPEAKER_09: Squat.
  • SPEAKER_09: Do you want to do it without the sound effects, or do you want to do it with the sound effects?
  • SPEAKER_07: Squat.
  • SPEAKER_07: Squat.
  • SPEAKER_07: Squat.
  • SPEAKER_07: Squat.
  • SPEAKER_09: Squat.
  • SPEAKER_09: Squat.
  • SPEAKER_04: Squat.
  • SPEAKER_04: Squat.
  • SPEAKER_04: Squat.
  • SPEAKER_04: I'm Eva.
  • SPEAKER_07: Yo, I'm looking for an MC Squawk box.
  • SPEAKER_04: Looking for a squawk box?
  • SPEAKER_07: Yes, sir?
  • SPEAKER_04: Well, we just sell records and tapes.
  • SPEAKER_07: How about duckling fantasy?
  • SPEAKER_04: What fantasies?
  • Alex Trebek: Duckling fantasies?
  • Alex Trebek: Duckling fantasies?
  • Alex Trebek: Is it available for rental?
  • SPEAKER_04: Is it on cassette?
  • Alex Trebek: Video cassette?
  • Alex Trebek: Cosset?
  • SPEAKER_04: You want a video cassette?
  • SPEAKER_04: We just sell them, we don't rent them.
  • Alex Trebek: Let's purchase one.
  • Alex Trebek: Together.
  • SPEAKER_04: Oh, I don't have to cash, man.
  • Alex Trebek: As far as I'm concerned, we can skip.
  • Alex Trebek: We can skip the song of down, right?
  • SPEAKER_04: I'm saving up all my money for a shamrock shake.
  • Alex Trebek: Ah.
  • SPEAKER_01: Hello, wax tracks.
  • SPEAKER_07: Hi, do you have duckling fantasy?
  • SPEAKER_07: Do you have duck...
  • SPEAKER_01: Duckwing fantasy?
  • SPEAKER_01: Um, I'm, um, no, not down here.
  • SPEAKER_01: We don't stand...
  • SPEAKER_07: On cassettes.
  • SPEAKER_01: Uh, well, this is the CD store.
  • SPEAKER_07: How about MC Squawk Box?
  • SPEAKER_01: MC Squawk Box?
  • SPEAKER_01: Now, what do you want that on?
  • Alex Trebek: On cassette or vinyl?
  • SPEAKER_01: We don't carry anything on cassette now.
  • SPEAKER_01: And if we have it on vinyl, it's at our vinyl store, and I can give you that phone number.
  • SPEAKER_01: How about Duckling Fantasy?
  • SPEAKER_01: How about Duckling?
  • SPEAKER_01: Can you hear me?
  • SPEAKER_01: Yes, sir.
  • SPEAKER_01: Okay.
  • Alex Trebek: Yes, sir.
  • SPEAKER_01: Okay, if you're looking for this...
  • Alex Trebek: I'm not going to lie to you, sir.
  • SPEAKER_01: Okay, if you're looking for this stuff on vinyl or on cassette, this is the wrong store.
  • Alex Trebek: Can we agree on the Duckling part?
  • SPEAKER_01: Well, we can agree this.
  • SPEAKER_01: that if you're looking for vinyl or cassette,
  • SPEAKER_01: that this is the wrong store.
  • SPEAKER_01: Hello.
  • SPEAKER_01: Hey, hello.
  • Alex Trebek: Hi, uh, you guys, uh, have takeout?
  • SPEAKER_02: Do we have takeout?
  • SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
  • None: Yeah.
  • Alex Trebek: What is that?
  • SPEAKER_02: What?
  • SPEAKER_02: In the background.
  • SPEAKER_02: Okay, try that one more time.
  • Alex Trebek: Okay, uh, what's going on?
  • SPEAKER_02: Did you want a place in order?
  • Alex Trebek: How do you serve food?
  • SPEAKER_02: How do we serve food?
  • Alex Trebek: Yeah.
  • SPEAKER_02: Well, if you come in and get a slice, we can put it on a plate or put it in a bag.
  • SPEAKER_02: We don't have any dine in or anything.
  • SPEAKER_02: It's just pick up or delivery.
  • Alex Trebek: Would you pick up my sack?
  • Alex Trebek: Oh.
  • SPEAKER_02: Will you tell whoever's belting into the phone to stop?
  • SPEAKER_02: Is that I can hear you?
  • Alex Trebek: Okay, so you said I could pick up.
  • SPEAKER_02: You can pick up or you can have it delivered.
  • SPEAKER_02: If you have the internet, you can go on our website and check out our menu.
  • Alex Trebek: Do you maybe want to check out my prayers?
  • Alex Trebek: Do you maybe want to check out my prayers?
  • Alex Trebek: Or?
  • SPEAKER_02: Pricks?
  • SPEAKER_02: No, but I think I'm talking to one.
  • Alex Trebek: I don't know the store hours.
  • Alex Trebek: I don't know the prices.
  • Alex Trebek: I don't know anything here.
  • SPEAKER_02: Okay.
  • SPEAKER_02: Well, we are open today until 10...
  • SPEAKER_07: Okay.
  • SPEAKER_07: What are the hours?
  • SPEAKER_07: What are the hours?
  • SPEAKER_07: What are the directions?
  • Alex Trebek: It depends on what you want.
  • SPEAKER_07: What are the hours?
  • SPEAKER_07: What are the directions?
  • Alex Trebek: How much is it?
  • Alex Trebek: Hello?
  • Alex Trebek: Yes, sir.
  • Alex Trebek: It's Herbert.
  • Alex Trebek: I'm local here.
  • Alex Trebek: I'm in need of a broom.
  • SPEAKER_05: Where are you from?
  • Alex Trebek: I just need a broom.
  • Alex Trebek: I'm local. We got some stage hands out here.
  • Alex Trebek: And we're a couple of brooms shy.
  • Alex Trebek: So...
  • SPEAKER_05: Where are you?
  • Alex Trebek: Can you loan us a broom, please?
  • SPEAKER_05: Where are you?
  • Alex Trebek: I'm just local to you, catty corner.
  • Alex Trebek: Two, three brooms, we're done.
  • Alex Trebek: Done deal. There's two or three of us here.
  • SPEAKER_05: But where?
  • Alex Trebek: Studio City.
  • SPEAKER_04: I don't know what you're talking about.
  • Alex Trebek: I consider it a big favor.
  • Alex Trebek: I know it's short notice.
  • Alex Trebek: We got three or four stage hands here.
  • SPEAKER_05: Where?
  • Alex Trebek: Just locally.
  • Alex Trebek: We're just local here.
  • SPEAKER_05: Local where?
  • SPEAKER_05: Give me a street.
  • Alex Trebek: I'm on Magnolia Bay.
  • Alex Trebek: 8,400 block.
  • SPEAKER_04: Of Magnolia?
  • SPEAKER_04: You're miles away from where I live, though.
  • SPEAKER_04: I don't know what you're talking about.
  • Alex Trebek: Can help me put together a pickup?
  • Alex Trebek: Sure.
  • Alex Trebek: What's your name?
  • Alex Trebek: Herbert.
  • Alex Trebek: Herbert.
  • Alex Trebek: What?
  • Alex Trebek: Prick.
  • Alex Trebek: Prick.
  • None: I'm local for pickup.
  • Alex Trebek: Let's see.
  • SPEAKER_08: Your voice sounds familiar, man.
  • Alex Trebek: You pick up my sack?
  • SPEAKER_08: Your voice sounds familiar.
  • SPEAKER_08: I don't know why.
  • SPEAKER_08: I need a pickup.
  • SPEAKER_08: I swear. I don't know why you sound familiar.
  • SPEAKER_08: You sound like a faggot I know. I met once.
  • SPEAKER_08: You sound like the short faggut.
  • SPEAKER_08: I met once. He came by this restaurant.
  • Alex Trebek: I hear some voices in the background.
  • Alex Trebek: Hello, you are you.
  • Alex Trebek: Tonight.
  • Alex Trebek: You serve me tonight?
  • Alex Trebek: Who?
  • SPEAKER_07: Who?
  • SPEAKER_08: Who?
  • SPEAKER_08: You okay, man?
  • SPEAKER_08: Sounds like you're dying or something.
  • SPEAKER_08: Who are you?
  • Alex Trebek: Herbert.
  • Alex Trebek: Prick?
  • SPEAKER_08: Herbert.
  • SPEAKER_08: Prick?
  • SPEAKER_08: Your name is in Sunni or anything?
  • SPEAKER_08: Do you have Maloui?
  • SPEAKER_08: You don't know but nobody named Sonny?
  • SPEAKER_07: Or Suzuki?
  • SPEAKER_08: No, we don't.
  • SPEAKER_08: We're burgers and fries here.
  • SPEAKER_07: How about Susuki?
  • SPEAKER_08: Let me ask question. Where are you from?
  • SPEAKER_08: I'm local.
  • SPEAKER_08: Oh, you're local, I see.
  • Alex Trebek: Who?
  • SPEAKER_08: Who?
  • SPEAKER_08: Who?
  • Alex Trebek: Hey.
  • Alex Trebek: I need a picture of here.
  • SPEAKER_04: We don't do pictures.
  • SPEAKER_07: How about Jolo shots?
  • SPEAKER_04: We should do J-Lo shots, but we don't.
  • Alex Trebek: You and me should do that sometime, huh?
  • SPEAKER_04: Maybe.