wallace-thrasher

Longmont Potion Castle 19 (2022)

Track 1: LPC 19 Medley 1

None: Hello?
SPEAKER_04: Hey Travis.
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
SPEAKER_03: Hey, this is Max Braxton.
SPEAKER_03: What's going on?
SPEAKER_04: Uh, I don't know. You're Max Braxton?
SPEAKER_03: Yes, yes. I just moved in. I'm your new neighbor. I got your number from my friend at the DMV.
SPEAKER_03: Good friend of mine up, uh, since we live in the same neighborhood. How's it going, man?
None: Hello?
SPEAKER_04: Hello?
SPEAKER_03: Hey, Travis, man, come on.
SPEAKER_03: Just help me out for a second, okay?
SPEAKER_03: It's Max.
SPEAKER_03: I don't know you, dude.
SPEAKER_04: I'm your new neighbor, man.
SPEAKER_03: I just live on the same street.
SPEAKER_03: I just have a problem with my garage door.
SPEAKER_03: I just need you to help me real quick.
SPEAKER_03: I can give you four or five dollars.
SPEAKER_04: Well, I'm at work right now, so that's a no, but I still don't.
SPEAKER_03: No.
SPEAKER_04: What street do you live on?
SPEAKER_03: I just moved from Colorado.
SPEAKER_04: Yeah, but you said you live on my streets.
SPEAKER_04: What street do you live on?
SPEAKER_03: I do. I just moved to Lexington from Colorado, like this week.
SPEAKER_03: I can bring you the lever, you push it, and I'll just tell you when my garage door is moving, okay?
SPEAKER_03: That's all I need.
SPEAKER_03: My friend said you'd help me out.
SPEAKER_04: How'd you get my number?
SPEAKER_03: At the DMV. He looked up your number for me.
SPEAKER_04: It's kind of against the law. I'd be giving out phone numbers at the DMV.
SPEAKER_04: They're not the police department, so I'd like to know who gave you my number.
SPEAKER_03: Well, be cool, man. I just need help with my garage door.
SPEAKER_03: It'll take like 20.
SPEAKER_03: 30 minutes.
SPEAKER_03: I give you $5.6.
SPEAKER_04: $6, dude, it ain't worth my time.
SPEAKER_04: That's a pack of cigarette.
SPEAKER_03: Well, per hour, I mean.
SPEAKER_03: Just be cool.
SPEAKER_03: I'll come over to your house about five, okay?
SPEAKER_03: And we'll just hook up.
SPEAKER_04: Do not show up in my house or you will get a gun in your fucking face.
SPEAKER_03: Just be cool, dude.
SPEAKER_03: This is Max Braxton.
SPEAKER_04: I don't fucking know him, Max Brackston.
SPEAKER_04: Stop calling me.
SPEAKER_03: Hey, I'll give you $10.
SPEAKER_03: I mean...
SPEAKER_03: Hello?
SPEAKER_03: What's going on?
SPEAKER_03: Dude, quit fucking calling me.
SPEAKER_03: This is Max, your new neighbor, man.
SPEAKER_04: No, you're not my fucking neighbor.
SPEAKER_04: Quit fucking calling me.
SPEAKER_04: Fuck you.
SPEAKER_04: I don't want to help you.
SPEAKER_04: Quit fucking calling me.
SPEAKER_03: I'm just going to stop by, okay?
SPEAKER_03: I got the door to go up on my garage.
SPEAKER_03: I just need your help bringing it back down.
SPEAKER_04: I don't give you a fuck about your garage.
SPEAKER_03: I can give you $10.
SPEAKER_04: Call it, motherfucker.
SPEAKER_04: Put some fucking purse down and pull it, bitch.
SPEAKER_04: Dude, quit fucking calling me.
SPEAKER_03: Our friend at the DMV is going to be torched if you don't help me out.
SPEAKER_04: I don't have a fucking friend in the DMV, dumbass.
SPEAKER_04: I know who works at the DMV.
SPEAKER_04: I don't know any of them.
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, Sherman Jump.
SPEAKER_04: Sherman Jump sounds like a male.
SPEAKER_04: I'm pretty sure everybody, my DMV is a female, so...
SPEAKER_03: Oh, he's 100% male.
SPEAKER_03: He's going to take you down if you don't give me a hand here.
SPEAKER_03: You got it?
SPEAKER_03: So I'm going to stop by in about 20 minutes and we'll just work it out.
SPEAKER_03: Boom.
SPEAKER_03: We're done.
SPEAKER_04: How we're going to work at your garage.
SPEAKER_03: I'll bring you the lever.
SPEAKER_03: You push it.
SPEAKER_04: I don't want to help you.
SPEAKER_04: Why don't want to call somebody else?
SPEAKER_03: Because you're my neighbor.
SPEAKER_03: No, you're not.
SPEAKER_03: Dude, I just moved down here from Colorado, like I told you.
SPEAKER_04: Then why is your numbers say California?
SPEAKER_03: I have a cell phone and I have a landline.
SPEAKER_04: Why are you fucking glitching out like it's something else?
SPEAKER_03: I am on my cell phone right now.
SPEAKER_03: You want a piece?
SPEAKER_03: on me?
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
SPEAKER_03: Stuff?
SPEAKER_05: Conduce?
SPEAKER_05: Hey, yeah.
SPEAKER_03: To get a pickup.
SPEAKER_03: Okay, what would you like?
SPEAKER_03: I'd like to get a pick up some food today.
SPEAKER_03: Please.
SPEAKER_03: What would you like?
SPEAKER_03: I want to get extra cheese.
SPEAKER_03: Okay, and extra bean.
SPEAKER_03: Okay?
SPEAKER_01: I can't understand what you're saying.
SPEAKER_01: I can't understand what you say?
SPEAKER_03: I want to pick up for lunch for a pickup.
SPEAKER_01: I got that.
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
SPEAKER_03: What do you want?
SPEAKER_03: Oh.
SPEAKER_03: I'm trying to get extra.
SPEAKER_03: cheese and extra bean with my order.
SPEAKER_03: Okay, what's your order?
SPEAKER_03: Two different types of cheese.
SPEAKER_03: Half and half.
SPEAKER_03: For the rice.
SPEAKER_03: Extra large.
SPEAKER_03: How much is it?
SPEAKER_03: For this much?
SPEAKER_03: I don't even understand what you're saying.
SPEAKER_03: You want extra cheese half and half.
None: What are you saying, bro?
None: You just come on in.
SPEAKER_03: We'll place you order when you go in.
SPEAKER_03: You want a pint of rice?
SPEAKER_03: You want a pint of rice?
SPEAKER_03: No, I want extra corn.
SPEAKER_03: Extra large.
SPEAKER_03: Extra large.
SPEAKER_01: What corn?
SPEAKER_01: What corn?
SPEAKER_01: mixture.
SPEAKER_01: Yes.
SPEAKER_01: You're just playing games.
SPEAKER_01: You're saying beans, rice, extra, what do you want?
SPEAKER_01: You gotta just come in, okay?
SPEAKER_01: I'm not dealing with this right now, okay?
SPEAKER_03: Please, I have a credit card for you.
SPEAKER_01: I don't understand what you're saying.
SPEAKER_03: How much is it?
SPEAKER_03: You know, come on.
SPEAKER_01: You're not making no sense.
SPEAKER_03: I need to pick up, please.
SPEAKER_01: Hey, bud, you gotta stop calling.
SPEAKER_01: He is.
SPEAKER_01: You're not making sense.
SPEAKER_01: You're not making sense.
SPEAKER_01: You're wasting our time.
SPEAKER_01: If you start making sense, I can take your order.
SPEAKER_03: This is Max KFC.
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
SPEAKER_01: What are you looking for, sir?
SPEAKER_01: What are you looking for, sir?
SPEAKER_03: extra large corn and beans.
SPEAKER_03: We don't have corn.
SPEAKER_01: We don't have corn, sir.
SPEAKER_01: We don't have corn.
SPEAKER_03: You come to me.
SPEAKER_03: With beef and corn, okay, to me, you pick me up.
SPEAKER_03: Okay?
SPEAKER_03: I pick you up?
SPEAKER_03: What?
SPEAKER_03: Yes.
SPEAKER_03: And I eat in the store.
SPEAKER_01: Okay, but we don't have corn.
SPEAKER_01: I'm explaining that to you.
SPEAKER_01: You're not understanding.
SPEAKER_01: We don't have corn.
SPEAKER_03: Okay, I pick it up.
SPEAKER_03: I pick it up.
SPEAKER_01: Okay, come over here.
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
SPEAKER_03: I need four corn for extra cheese.
SPEAKER_01: That's it.
SPEAKER_01: Four corn, four extra cheese.
SPEAKER_03: Oh, wow.
SPEAKER_01: Four corn what?
SPEAKER_03: That's surprise.
SPEAKER_03: This is Max, brother.
SPEAKER_03: I need to eat today.
SPEAKER_03: You make me run around and around, you know?
SPEAKER_01: I don't make you run around.
SPEAKER_01: Excuse me.
SPEAKER_01: I don't make you run around.
SPEAKER_01: I don't make you do nothing, dude.
SPEAKER_01: You make me pick up the phone to waste ten minutes for my life.
SPEAKER_03: You run around and around.
SPEAKER_03: What's that about, you know, friend?
SPEAKER_03: I need corn and bean today.
SPEAKER_01: That's it.
SPEAKER_01: Okay, you come here.
SPEAKER_03: You come here and you order it, okay?
SPEAKER_03: You come to me with a beef and bean.
SPEAKER_01: I come to you?
SPEAKER_03: With the beef and bean.
SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
SPEAKER_01: Okay, I'm going to tape this, and I'm going to call the officer, and you can deal with you, okay?
SPEAKER_03: I'm going to push you downtown.
SPEAKER_01: Are you going to push me downtown?
SPEAKER_03: How's the sound?
SPEAKER_01: You're going to push me downtown?
SPEAKER_03: You run me round and round?
SPEAKER_01: I don't make you run around.
SPEAKER_03: I don't do that to you.
SPEAKER_03: I call for extra cheese, you know, one time.
SPEAKER_01: We're not taking your order.
SPEAKER_03: Why?
SPEAKER_01: I'm going to put your phone on block.
SPEAKER_01: Have a good day.
SPEAKER_01: Don't call back.
SPEAKER_03: I'm going to put you on the ground.
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
SPEAKER_01: I'm going to call the police, and they can call you, okay?
SPEAKER_01: Thank you.
SPEAKER_05: Hello, this is Tony. How can I help you?
SPEAKER_03: Tony, my name's Marty KFC. How are you doing today, sir?
SPEAKER_05: Good. What kind of for you?
SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I'm right here in Mancato, and I got a new house. I was looking to spruce things up here.
SPEAKER_05: Hey, looking for some flowers?
SPEAKER_03: No, sir, no, sir. I saw an infomercial is what I saw.
SPEAKER_03: About a special kind of polymer flooring. It's almost like a quarter.
SPEAKER_03: pork board type of floorboard material.
SPEAKER_03: Oh, that's hilarious.
SPEAKER_03: Hoping to get us something.
SPEAKER_06: We are fresh out of flooring options, but we do have flowers.
SPEAKER_06: We're a florist.
SPEAKER_06: Not a florist.
SPEAKER_03: No, I got this number up at the grocery store.
SPEAKER_03: Guys, a friend of mine up there.
SPEAKER_03: Put me in touch.
SPEAKER_06: Ah, that's fantastic.
SPEAKER_03: Do you have a showroom or how many people are on your sales floors, sir?
SPEAKER_06: Uh, you're funny.
SPEAKER_06: Uh, you're funny.
SPEAKER_03: No, sir, I got about 3,200 square feet here I'm trying to cover.
SPEAKER_06: We are a flower shop.
SPEAKER_06: Not a floor shop.
SPEAKER_03: Buddy, I got nearly 3,400 square feet here.
SPEAKER_03: Family of Five.
SPEAKER_05: I would check your local tile store.
SPEAKER_03: Family of Five.
SPEAKER_05: Well, fantastic.
SPEAKER_03: Good friend of mine sent me up here.
SPEAKER_03: You said you could hook me up.
SPEAKER_03: I like a nice,
SPEAKER_03: glossy cork kind of finish to the floorboard.
SPEAKER_06: All right, man.
SPEAKER_06: I love it.
SPEAKER_06: It's great.
SPEAKER_06: Good job.
SPEAKER_06: But if you're seriously looking for flooring,
SPEAKER_06: all right, sounds good.
SPEAKER_03: Thank you, now.
SPEAKER_03: Okay, here.
SPEAKER_03: Hello?
SPEAKER_03: Hi, yeah.
SPEAKER_03: Meat, Market?
SPEAKER_00: Yes, it is.
SPEAKER_03: I was looking for some big hog.
SPEAKER_00: We don't see a hog.
SPEAKER_03: Where do I have to go?
SPEAKER_03: Hello, my friend.
SPEAKER_00: Oh, I really don't know.
SPEAKER_03: Do you have any juice gas?
SPEAKER_00: I don't know what that is.
SPEAKER_03: You don't know what is?
SPEAKER_00: What you asked me, did I have what?
SPEAKER_00: Whatever you asked me just now, I don't know what it is.
SPEAKER_00: I don't know what you say.
SPEAKER_03: Juice gas.
SPEAKER_08: Listen, listen, you got to find dick brought in your ass.
SPEAKER_08: Don't call this number again.
SPEAKER_03: I need a big hog.
SPEAKER_08: Big dick in your mouth.
SPEAKER_08: Okay?
SPEAKER_08: Fuck you.
SPEAKER_08: Hello?
SPEAKER_03: Hey, yeah, I was looking for some big hog.
SPEAKER_08: We don't sell that, man.
SPEAKER_03: Well, where can I get it, friend?
SPEAKER_08: I have no idea.
SPEAKER_08: Well, no, hang up the phone.
SPEAKER_08: Do answer the phone.
SPEAKER_08: That motherfucker, do answer the phone.
SPEAKER_08: Spider?
SPEAKER_03: Yes, can I get any spleen from you guys?
SPEAKER_05: Splane?
SPEAKER_03: Yes.
SPEAKER_05: What's that?
SPEAKER_05: You know, it's like a kidney or a liver sort of.
None: Huh?
SPEAKER_03: Do you have any of that at all?
SPEAKER_05: What?
SPEAKER_03: Spleen.
SPEAKER_05: What does that sound?
SPEAKER_03: Huh?
SPEAKER_05: What does that sound?
SPEAKER_03: Well, I got a dinner party tonight.
SPEAKER_04: I don't know the fuck you lying.
SPEAKER_03: No, I need to get some hog.
SPEAKER_03: Can you hook me up, or what?
SPEAKER_03: I'm out of pay phone here, then.
SPEAKER_08: What's like this shit?
SPEAKER_03: Can I get any juice gas off you?
SPEAKER_08: Somebody wants some skin, some...
SPEAKER_08: Is that info?
SPEAKER_08: Huh?
SPEAKER_08: Is that info?
SPEAKER_08: Hello?
SPEAKER_02: What?
SPEAKER_08: This is this shit.
SPEAKER_02: Up in smoke.
SPEAKER_02: This is Tom.
SPEAKER_03: Oh, hi.
SPEAKER_03: I wanted to get like a gravity bong?
SPEAKER_02: Uh...
SPEAKER_02: From what I know of what you just mentioned,
SPEAKER_02: that's something we would make...
SPEAKER_02: Back when I was younger,
SPEAKER_02: ourselves, out of a bucket and an empty milk bottle or something.
SPEAKER_02: Plastic jug?
SPEAKER_02: and you submerse the jug in the water.
SPEAKER_02: That's what I know of a gravity thong.
SPEAKER_02: We have tons of water pipes, but nothing's called a gravity thong.
SPEAKER_03: Do you have any juice gas?
SPEAKER_02: Juice gas?
SPEAKER_02: I don't even know what that is.
SPEAKER_02: I have never heard of that, and I don't know what it is, so no, we don't have it.
SPEAKER_03: It's made by Crazy Bastard?
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, we definitely don't have that.
SPEAKER_03: You got any mysterious bliss up, or?
SPEAKER_02: No.
SPEAKER_02: No.
SPEAKER_03: Huh?
SPEAKER_02: We do not.
SPEAKER_03: Huh?
SPEAKER_03: You do not what?
SPEAKER_02: Have what?
SPEAKER_03: You do not what?
None: You do not what?
SPEAKER_02: Up and smoke.
SPEAKER_03: Hey, guy, yeah, I'm at a pay phone here.
SPEAKER_03: Can you just help me out with the juice gas if I ride the bus up bar?
SPEAKER_02: We don't have juice gas.
SPEAKER_02: I don't know what that is. I've never heard of it.
SPEAKER_03: What do you got on the mysterious bliss upper?
SPEAKER_03: What do you got on?
SPEAKER_02: No, I just got off the phone with you.
SPEAKER_02: We don't have any of the things that you're asking for.
SPEAKER_02: I've never even heard of them, and it seems to me like you're pulling my leg.
SPEAKER_03: Can you taste the sound of Mysterious Bliss?
SPEAKER_03: Remember that commercial?
SPEAKER_02: Shut up. Fuck up.
SPEAKER_07: Hello, hello, hello.
SPEAKER_03: Hi, this is Manny Wagstaff. How are you?
SPEAKER_07: I'm really upset because of how many times you called me.
SPEAKER_03: Well, I'm over at the sand farm.
SPEAKER_03: That's where I'm located.
SPEAKER_03: And we made you a chicken cake that we want to give you just as a gift.
SPEAKER_07: Um, I would love a chicken cake.
SPEAKER_03: You like it?
SPEAKER_07: Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_03: We're over at the sand farm.
SPEAKER_07: Okay, where's the sand farm?
SPEAKER_03: It's right here in the neighborhood. We're just here local.
SPEAKER_03: Okay.
SPEAKER_03: And just like any other present, what we would like you to do is,
SPEAKER_03: you to yell into the telephone. Okay.
SPEAKER_07: Okay.
SPEAKER_07: He told me to eat that.
SPEAKER_07: Um, is that good?
SPEAKER_03: Very good. Could you please yell into the telephone again?
SPEAKER_03: Okay.
SPEAKER_07: Okay.
None: Okay.
SPEAKER_03: Hey, can I ask a question, please?
SPEAKER_03: Okay.
SPEAKER_07: Yeah?
SPEAKER_03: What is your opinion of rubber bands?
SPEAKER_07: I love rubber bands.
SPEAKER_03: What is your opinion of worms?
SPEAKER_07: I love worms too.
SPEAKER_03: Have you ever kicked yourself in the leg?
SPEAKER_07: Have I ever kicked myself in the leg?
SPEAKER_03: Yes.
SPEAKER_03: So where do you like to stand?
SPEAKER_07: Where do I like to stand?
SPEAKER_07: In my living room?
SPEAKER_03: Do you remember my name?
None: No.
SPEAKER_03: It's Manny Wagstaff.
SPEAKER_07: Oh.
SPEAKER_03: Do you remember my name now?
SPEAKER_07: Yeah.
SPEAKER_07: Nanny Maxwell.
SPEAKER_03: Oh, boy.
SPEAKER_03: Hey, so.
SPEAKER_03: Hey, so do you like to feed squirrels?
SPEAKER_07: Do I like to feed squirrels?
SPEAKER_03: Yes.
SPEAKER_07: How do you know I like to feed squirrels? Because I,
SPEAKER_07: name the squirrel and I feed him.
SPEAKER_07: So yes, I like to feed squirrels.
SPEAKER_03: Do you ever feed them chicken cakes?
SPEAKER_07: No.
SPEAKER_06: Hello?
SPEAKER_07: No.
SPEAKER_07: No.
SPEAKER_06: Hello?
SPEAKER_07: No, I never feed in a squirrel.
SPEAKER_07: Chicken cake.
None: Hello?
SPEAKER_03: You gotta talk to my manager.
SPEAKER_03: Okay.
SPEAKER_07: Yeah, who's your manager?
SPEAKER_03: Here he comes, okay.
SPEAKER_03: Okay?
SPEAKER_03: You let him know you talk to me.
SPEAKER_07: Okay.
SPEAKER_07: Cobra side.
SPEAKER_07: Um, hi.
SPEAKER_07: Um, I forget his name again, but somebody wanted me to talk to you about chicken cake.
SPEAKER_02: I don't know what?
SPEAKER_02: That means you've called the wrong number, I'm sorry.
SPEAKER_07: Okay, goodbye.