Longmont Potion Castle 12 (2016)

Longmont Potion Castle 12

Track 20: Alaska Shakes

Runtime: 335 seconds

This track needs reviewing! --> Lend a hand <--

Aliases: Chaplain Schumacher

  • Frank Lopez: Hello.
  • LPC: Hello, this is Schumacher. How are you doing?
  • Frank Lopez: Yep, Frank Lopez in Alaska.
  • LPC: Okay.
  • Frank Lopez: I'm looking for a co-driver to share expenses with from Alaska, Colorado.
  • LPC: Good deal. I could accompany on your trek.
  • Frank Lopez: Okay, let me break down some information here.
  • Frank Lopez: What's your name?
  • LPC: Chaplain Schumacher.
  • Frank Lopez: Chaplain, Schumacher.
  • Frank Lopez: Are you a minister?
  • LPC: I'm just trucking up.
  • LPC: Rebar.
  • Frank Lopez: What is that?
  • LPC: Construction material.
  • Frank Lopez: Oh, okay.
  • Frank Lopez: Not everybody knows what rebar is.
  • Frank Lopez: So you're driving your own rig? Is that it?
  • LPC: Are you a big drinker there?
  • Frank Lopez: I'm not a drinker at all.
  • LPC: Okay.
  • Frank Lopez: What I'm trying to follow here is that you're going to be trucking rebar up here.
  • Frank Lopez: Does that mean you have your own rig?
  • Frank Lopez: Because I've got a Subaru station like you.
  • LPC: I'm 6'4.11.
  • LPC: A size 17 and a half sock.
  • Frank Lopez: Well, I'm 5'10, you know, so.
  • LPC: Oh, I'm going to stretch you out, Guy.
  • Frank Lopez: Excuse me?
  • LPC: So how much can I expect to make here, monetarily?
  • Frank Lopez: You?
  • Frank Lopez: Making?
  • Frank Lopez: No, I'm not paying for a driver.
  • Frank Lopez: A driver is to go out of Alaska with me,
  • Frank Lopez: have their own money to stay at motels or whatever
  • Frank Lopez: and help share with gas.
  • LPC: I need a bus.
  • LPC: per diem at the very least.
  • Frank Lopez: I'm not looking to hire a driver because it's going to be expensive enough.
  • Frank Lopez: Read my ad again.
  • LPC: I'm drafting an invoice right now to send to you.
  • Frank Lopez: No, the whole point is to share expenses.
  • LPC: Listen, what kind of mileage you get on this thing?
  • Frank Lopez: On my Subaru?
  • Frank Lopez: 16 to 18.
  • LPC: What's all that noise up there?
  • Frank Lopez: I don't know. The noise is on your end.
  • Frank Lopez: Okay, I got a
  • LPC: mechanic. He's going to come out there and take a look.
  • Frank Lopez: I have my car checked out. I've maintained this car. I've got every maintenance record,
  • Frank Lopez: everything that's been done to this car.
  • Alex Trebek: Hello?
  • Frank Lopez: Okay, and I just had it move oil and filtered, and it'll get a tune-up, whether it needs it or not.
  • Frank Lopez: It's going to get a tune-up, another oil and filter change.
  • Alex Trebek: Hello?
  • Frank Lopez: Hello?
  • Alex Trebek: Yes.
  • Frank Lopez: I don't know who's good. I didn't dial anybody. We're getting all kinds of calls.
  • Alex Trebek: cross stuff. Yeah, me too. So, somebody's screwing with the phones. Okay, we'll just
  • LPC: have to deal with it. All right. So, we're going to get a mechanic out there and check it out.
  • Frank Lopez: You're going to get a mechanic from Anchorage to check out my car, and you expect to be paid.
  • Frank Lopez: No, I'm not the mechanic, sir. No, but you expect to be paid.
  • LPC: Well, hey, I got a good buddy of mine. He's a certified Suburu mechanic. It's not okay?
  • Frank Lopez: We're getting cross-referenced here on phone calls.
  • Frank Lopez: You must be getting calls coming in on you.
  • Alex Trebek: Yep.
  • Frank Lopez: Okay.
  • Alex Trebek: So nothing we can do about it.
  • Alex Trebek: I've talked to the phone company about it.
  • Alex Trebek: They can't do anything about it either.
  • Frank Lopez: Somebody's figured a way to cross-
  • Frank Lopez: No, I'm talking to somebody, and you're dialing in.
  • Frank Lopez: No, I'm in Alaska.
  • Frank Lopez: I'm in Alaska, and I'm talking to somebody in Colorado.
  • Alex Trebek: Well, I'm in California.
  • Alex Trebek: So we just have to bear with it.
  • Frank Lopez: Still there?
  • LPC: Well, hello.
  • Frank Lopez: You can have your mechanic call me, but I can't pay you, so you understand that.
  • LPC: Yes, sir.
  • Frank Lopez: Okay, that means I cannot pay anybody.
  • Frank Lopez: If you're willing to share expenses, I'll have your mechanic look at it.
  • LPC: Good deal, good deal.
  • Frank Lopez: We've got to stop this.
  • Alex Trebek: You just rang me again, guys.
  • Frank Lopez: I did not ring you.
  • LPC: Okay.
  • Frank Lopez: Okay, just have your mechanic.
  • Frank Lopez: Give me a call.
  • Frank Lopez: You got my number already listed on the ad.
  • LPC: And what's this about getting payment?
  • LPC: Have you got payment drafted?
  • Frank Lopez: I cannot pay you.
  • Frank Lopez: I cannot pay you.
  • Frank Lopez: I'm looking for somebody to share expenses from Alaska to Colorado or anywhere in between.
  • LPC: How much money do you need?
  • Frank Lopez: Oh, we got to end this.
  • LPC: How much do you need?
  • Frank Lopez: You should be ready for your own expenses as well.
  • Frank Lopez: I'm not driving all the way through.
  • Frank Lopez: I'm stopping at a motel at least two times.
  • Frank Lopez: It's three days through Canada.
  • Frank Lopez: So it's going to take a couple of motel rooms for you and for me.
  • Frank Lopez: And I don't know, sharing of gas, whatever the gas costs are.
  • Frank Lopez: I would say 500 bucks.
  • LPC: And then minus what you pay me, correct?
  • Frank Lopez: I'm not going to pay you anything.
  • Frank Lopez: I can't afford to pay anybody anything.
  • Frank Lopez: Don't call me again.
  • LPC: It's $500.
  • Frank Lopez: It's not going to work out.
  • Frank Lopez: You have to have the cash in your pocket to share expenses and to have for your meals and so forth.
  • Frank Lopez: I am eating on shakes, meal replacement shakes.
  • Frank Lopez: So that's going to be my meals.
  • Frank Lopez: You know, I might have a meal every other day or something.
  • Frank Lopez: I don't get paid, and I'm not paying anybody.
  • LPC: How do I get the money to you?
  • Frank Lopez: No, no.
  • Frank Lopez: Just keeps getting interrupted.
  • LPC: It's okay.
  • Frank Lopez: No, it's not okay.
  • Frank Lopez: Somebody else keeps interrupting.
  • Frank Lopez: Look, this is not going to work out, I said before, so let's forget it.
  • Frank Lopez: Don't call me again.