Track 12: Dipstick

• SPEAKER_03: Hello?
  
• SPEAKER_03: Yes, this is Veta Riquel with United Parcel Service.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Who am I speaking with?
  
• SPEAKER_03: James Leefie.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Yes, I've been having a difficulty delivering your parcel.
  
• SPEAKER_03: I just wanted to make sure someone's going to be around their dipsticks of some kind of General Motors.
  
• SPEAKER_03: And I'm a supervisor here.
  
• SPEAKER_02: Well, to the best of my knowledge, I'm not waiting for a package from General Motors.
  
• SPEAKER_03: It says Dipsticks.com.
  
• SPEAKER_03: And you haven't returned any of our voice.
  
• SPEAKER_03: We've left you, sir.
  
• SPEAKER_02: Okay, I'm not expecting anything from General Motors.
  
• SPEAKER_03: That's dipsticks.com, sir, and I believe I've stated that.
  
• SPEAKER_02: To the best of my knowledge, I'm not waiting for a package from dipstick.com.
  
• SPEAKER_02: What address are they supposedly going to be delivering this to?
  
• SPEAKER_03: Do I need to talk to somebody else, or are you the man of the house, or whom am I speaking to here?
  
• SPEAKER_03: Well, I told you earlier.
  
• SPEAKER_03: My name is James Leifie.
  
• SPEAKER_03: And as I said, I'm Federico with the United Parcel.
  
• SPEAKER_03: service. I've been here for seven months here at UPS.
  
• SPEAKER_02: That's fine. But what I'm trying to determine is whether or not I'm supposed to be the recipient
  
• SPEAKER_02: of this. The only, I'm not expecting anything in the automotive line, which I'm presuming
  
• SPEAKER_02: dipstick.com has something to do with. Either that or it's a pejorative phrase for something else,
  
• SPEAKER_02: but I'm not going to worry about that.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Oh, you're the recipient. I can guarantee you that.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Okay.
  
• SPEAKER_03: I worked here long enough to determine that for myself.
  
• SPEAKER_03: I don't need to check with...
  
• SPEAKER_02: Well, I'm just trying to determine whether this was supposed to be a delivery to my business or to my home.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Oh, I've made the determination, sir.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Well, I haven't.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Oh, no.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Dipsticks.com, sir.
  
• SPEAKER_03: If you can get in gear here and get the payment prepared, we can resolve this this evening and have it to you...
  
• SPEAKER_02: Sir, I honestly think that you should contact my lawyer because I've got nothing to do with anybody named
  
• SPEAKER_02: Dickstick.com.
  
• SPEAKER_02: We've left three voicemails, fella.
  
• SPEAKER_03: No, you have not. Not at this number.
  
• SPEAKER_03: And you have not returned any of our messages, and you haven't responded...
  
• SPEAKER_03: Since I have not gotten them, I haven't returned any.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I know you haven't returned it. I've left you a voicemail. I left you a slip on the door.
  
• SPEAKER_03: At this number?
  
• SPEAKER_03: I haven't heard anything from you at all.
  
• SPEAKER_03: I'm northern at all. I don't know what the obstacle is, but, sir, can we resolve this today?
  
• SPEAKER_03: Is my question...
  
• SPEAKER_03: Certainly, if you'll tell me where you anticipate it being delivered.
  
• SPEAKER_03: What is the delivery address on the parcel?
  
• SPEAKER_03: Well, I don't have it handy, sir. It's on the dock right now.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Oh, well...
  
• SPEAKER_03: Okay, no.
  
• SPEAKER_03: If you don't have it, then perhaps you should try finding that, so I can determine if this is legitimate.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Sir, I've made the determination, as I said.
  
• SPEAKER_03: But I have not, sir.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Well, let me just get the running number from your account, and then we'll get the payment handled.
  
• SPEAKER_03: $486.
  
• SPEAKER_02: you've been from... Sir, this is obviously a scam. You'll excuse me if I hang up.
  
• SPEAKER_02: Thank you very much.
  
• SPEAKER_03: No, no, no, no, no, no. Well, I don't...
  
• SPEAKER_03: University of Tennessee.
  
• SPEAKER_03: This is Juan with UPS.com.
  
• SPEAKER_03: What appears to be the trouble today, sir?
  
• SPEAKER_02: I have no idea. Someone called me and said that I had a package that was supposedly being delivered
  
• SPEAKER_02: from dipstick.com, and that I needed to line up the payment. I have never ordered anything.
  
• SPEAKER_02: from any organization named dipstick.com.
  
• SPEAKER_02: I see.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Well, I'm the administrator here.
  
• SPEAKER_03: What did you order, and when were you...
  
• SPEAKER_03: I did not order anything.
  
• SPEAKER_03: You did not.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Apparently, you had a disagreement.
  
• SPEAKER_02: And all I was trying to determine
  
• SPEAKER_02: was what the delivery address was
  
• SPEAKER_02: on this hypothetical parcel
  
• SPEAKER_02: so that I could determine whether this had
  
• SPEAKER_02: to do with my work or my
  
• SPEAKER_02: personal business. And the
  
• SPEAKER_02: individual that was on the phone, who
  
• SPEAKER_02: sounds suspiciously like you,
  
• SPEAKER_02: did not have any idea where it was supposed to be delivered, which seems very odd if you're United Parcel Service.
  
• SPEAKER_02: I'm an administrator here. I've been working...
  
• SPEAKER_02: I don't really care if you're Jesus arisen from the grave.
  
• SPEAKER_02: If I can't determine that this is a valid delivery for me, I'm not going to accept it.
  
• SPEAKER_02: And I don't understand anything about payment for something I have never ordered from an organization named dipstick.com.
  
• SPEAKER_01: I am the embodiment of God.
  
• SPEAKER_01: I am divinity and humanity combined.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Okay, so you have a complaint, and I need a payment, and we need the best time to deliver.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Those are the three items on my agenda today, sir.
  
• SPEAKER_03: If we can get those resolved today, we'll be in good shape.
  
• SPEAKER_03: I haven't ordered anything.
  
• SPEAKER_03: So I am hardly going to pay for something that I haven't ordered.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Oh. Okay, you want to come pick it up, you're saying then.
  
• SPEAKER_03: I can give you our...
  
• SPEAKER_02: No, I'm saying I did not order any item from any item from any...
  
• SPEAKER_02: organization named dipstick.com, which is what the first party told me.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Okay, I can tell you, I've been here for many, many years. I've seen lots of parcels of all shapes and sizes.
  
• SPEAKER_03: That's fine, but I have not ordered anything. Okay, and then you want to come pick it up?
  
• SPEAKER_03: No, I want nothing to do with it in any way, shape, or form.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Okay, why don't I come out there myself, get you familiarize?
  
• SPEAKER_03: Sure.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Where are you supposed to be coming?
  
• SPEAKER_03: Well, I am in the administrative office.
  
• SPEAKER_02: And where are you supposed to be coming?
  
• SPEAKER_02: Where is the package supposedly to be delivered?
  
• SPEAKER_03: It's a residential delivery, sir. I can promise you that.
  
• SPEAKER_03: And to what address?
  
• SPEAKER_03: It's a residential address, and I've got no problem bringing that to you.
  
• SPEAKER_03: Myself, I want to resolve this here today at UPS.
  
• SPEAKER_03: How about this?
  
• SPEAKER_02: Yes, sir.
  
• SPEAKER_02: Why don't you give me your extension?
  
• SPEAKER_02: I will call the...
  
• SPEAKER_02: UPS global number and try to get in contact with you.
  
• SPEAKER_02: That sounds phenomenal.
  
• SPEAKER_02: I'm an area code...
  
• SPEAKER_02: No, no, no, no.
  
• SPEAKER_02: I'm going to call a UPS published number on their website and ask to speak to you.
  
• SPEAKER_02: And I need an extension number.
  
• SPEAKER_03: That's not a problem at all.
  
• SPEAKER_03: That's a perfectly suitable suggestion that you've made.
  
• SPEAKER_03: I want to commend you.
  
• SPEAKER_03: I want to applaud your willingness to resolve this matter from dipstick.com.
  
• SPEAKER_03: I just need a payment and the best time to deliver.
  
• SPEAKER_03: A payment for what?
  
• SPEAKER_03: $486.
  
• SPEAKER_03: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
  
• SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
  
• SPEAKER_02: Not how much.
  
• SPEAKER_02: For what am I supposedly paying?
  
• SPEAKER_00: Yeah, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow.
  
• SPEAKER_03: For the Dipstick.com parcel that you ordered, sir, back.
  
• SPEAKER_02: But I did not order anything from Dipstick.com.
  
• SPEAKER_03: I've got your digital signature here.
  
• SPEAKER_02: Gee, that's nice.
  
• SPEAKER_02: Where did you get that?
  
• SPEAKER_02: Who did I order it from?
  
• SPEAKER_03: From Dipstick.com General Motors Group.
  
• SPEAKER_02: Nope.
  
• SPEAKER_02: have never ordered anything from dipstick.com, Chrysler, General Motors, Ford, or any other group.
  
• SPEAKER_03: It's a big, big, colorful bunch of parcels we got here for you, sir. You're going to be delighted when we get there.
  
• SPEAKER_02: I sincerely doubt it. I don't think I ordered this. Thank you very much. Goodbye.
  
• SPEAKER_02: What's the best time to get there today?